Maybe it is the early hour, or the mood...or maybe because the "seed" was planted by something I read, and it stuck.
I found myself doing my routine this morning, grabbing my coffee, stagger to our office, put the TV on very low (news) and logging on to Facebook. So at this early hour, the feed was crawling, I caught up on what I missed last night...and moved on to my blogroll.
I read a post about drama and Facebook. This blogger has a fan page for her art, but usually doesn't check in very much. What caught her attention was the spat between 2 friends, not her personal friends, just FB friends. They were nasty and out to be noticed!!! Can't we all go to a time where we saw that, or had it happen suddenly on our wall? She said she was done with Facebook...I can't say I am ready for that...because the good out weighs the bad for me. But I did "hear" a few things.
These people we collect on FB, are they really our friends? I could weed out a few people I guess, but at one time I had 500 or more friends, some I had no idea who they were. During one of my funks, I did limit my friends to people I really did communicate with. What happens more is, I blab on and on and people read it and don't chat back... And I am guilty of that as well. It is kinda of voyeuristic, really!
We expect people to know of our news or worse yet, we ask a question, on FB, instead of picking up the phone. Then we say "I posted it on FB" as if that is enough... Also guilty of that.
This is all food for thought today for me. I have had miss-communications with some people, and some unpleasant things that hurt my feelings... that is life! And this can be done via text and email too! Technology? Has it left us, not dealing directly to the people we care about? I think I need to think more on this as I go on with my day.
I keep saying one day I will hit that button to delete...maybe a switch to more blogging...for now. Or maybe I won't even give it another thought in a day or so...could go either way!
Have a wonderful day, with NO DRAMA.....xo
I still cannot bring myself to join FB. I think I would become hooked so remain determined to avoid it. I hear so many negative comments about it I wonder if it is really worth the hassle. I guess mainly, though, people love it and use it to keep in touch but as you say the written word can often be misconstrued...even by email and text.
ReplyDeleteI sent a really newsy email to a dear friend, about a year ago, which really upset her although from my perspective it was just a chatty email. I rang her immediately and we came to realise that the way she had interpreted my words was totally different to the meaning I had intended. We cried, then laughed and vowed to speak on the phone more frequently and since then I have become very careful in my phrasing of my written word.
Great post Kathy
xx
Excellent thoughts today Kathy. I am always shocked at the levels that people will stoop to -- whether it is on the internet or in real life. Bitterness and ugliness. Jealousy and envy. Back stabbing. It's been going on forever and now it's just that much more visual and visible and in our faces when it is on something like Facebook, or a blog or a community discussion board.
ReplyDeleteWho are our friends on Facebook is an excellent question. We all have people we have friended or who have asked us to be friends and we really don't know them anywhere else but in the cyber world. Maybe they are a friend of a friend or belong to a similar group in an e-course but do we "know" them? I like the new feature that Facebook put out where you can decide if someone is a "friend" or an "acquaintance". You get very little in the feed or on your page from an acquaintance.
There are so many implications with Facebook and internet relationships, including stalking which is a bigger issue than many realize. Those little verbal battles are only the tip of the iceberg of what lurks behind people's keyboards.
I rethink Facebook all the time myself...and maybe the best way to go there is to have private groups where you are just talking to specific friends, even if it means you have one group with just one friend. It takes away all that static that clogs up our lives.
Now you've given me much to think on as I go about my day!! :)
I think it is so important that we think about these questions, that we don't blindly put our lives out their on the internet and keep an eye on who we let into our circle, however big it is.
ReplyDeleteI know that I appreciate a life as drama free as possible and I need my circle to reflect that.
So far, blogging and FB have brought me a lot more good than bad so I am enjoying the relationships it provides. But yes, it will never take the place of "real" communication, one on one, with a loved one.
Sure is a lot of food for thought, eh ?
I hope your Tuesday is full of sweet chatter, Kathy !
Cheers !
I have many of times typed something that someone took in a different way than was intended. I have also been on the other end of something typed that I took wrong or I questioned it. Then I have had people jump in a conversation feed I don't even have on my friend list and give me hell for what I believe in. I lost a friend once but now she is back being friends over something on my wall I had no control over. I have been a firm believer that this type of communication can get so taken out of context or received in the wrong way it was intended. If we didn't have this type of communication, think of all the wonderful people we would not know and keep in contact with. I think that these type of things are just like the things we deal with in everyday life but just in a different ways. Recently I have had to fight with insurance matters, prescriptions, medical stuff, and stuff that I was charged for that I did not buy. Sheez....Facebook is nothing compared to this stuff. I can go onto Facebook and always find a family member, close friend and there are people like you Kathy that gives me that laugh, or a kind word. or a (XO) to start my day. I have been rewarded in many ways because of Facebook and this type of communication comes with the territory. As in life we just have to be cautious. When I went through my divorce, the computer and AOL was my only way to communicate to the outside world. It kept me sane and safe and was my entertainment. It is all in what you make it.
ReplyDeleteGreat post Kathy.....xoxoxox